How old are you?

Are you being pushed down?

They say 60s are the new 50s.
People are working till they’re well over 65. What happened to I am just going to start getting my pension and enjoy a happy retired life at 58.

They say 50s are the new 40s.
People are still venturing out on their own at 55. What happened to just getting ready to welcome my grandson and enjoy the last 30 years of work I’ve put in.

They say 40s are the new 30s.
People are having their first kid at 45. What happened to I’m just getting used to my teenage daughters mood swings and learning to cope.

They say 30s are the new 20s.
People are going back to school at 35. What happened to phew, I’m just done with studying and waiting to soar in a corporate career.

Or

Are you being pulled up?

They say 10s are the new 20s
Children are fooling around with the latest gadgets at 15. What happened to I just got home from school mom, I wanna go out and play.

They say new borns are the new 10s? (WTF)
Toddlers are walking around abusing their chuddy buddies at 5. What happened to I just want to impress everyone with my nursery rhyme, 1 to 100 and A-Z repeating skills.

So I guess that means the 20s are the most screwed up with 30 years of your life being lived in what actually are just 10 years. So you’ll never know how old you are.

I am 26. Or am I?

Programmed

10 Alarm rings
20 Hit snooze
30 Alarm rings again
40 Turn it off

50 Rub eyes
60 Sit up
70 Finish chores
80 Get in car

90 Drive
100 Curse traffic
110 Drive
120 Curse traffic
130 Park at office

140 Talk to clients
150 Talk to colleagues
160 Talk to vendors
170 Lunch
180 Talk to clients
190 Talk to colleagues
200 Talk to vendors

210 Get in car
220 Goto 90
230 Finish cursing traffic
240 Park at home

250 Try to open door quietly
260 Serve self
270 Eat
280 Set alarm
290 Sleep
300 Goto 10

Programmed. For life.
Hail Andy and Larry Wachowski.






Where can I find my red pill. *sigh*

Sigh!

I liked my meat pink. Now I gotta eat red.
I liked my triangular walking track. Now its shaped like an apostrophe! (WTF!)
I liked following that cute little boy. Now I walk alone.
I liked having a name that at least sounded like one of my kind. Now, its not even like a name any more. (More like a question, beat that!)
I liked being Indian. Now I'm supposed to have become all international.
One fine day, pronunciamento - I am now someone else :(
I liked being there. Now, I wonder what the future holds.

Thanks for listening.

- Hutch, the Pug.
P.S. And they say, change is good.