Stray thoughts. Now on a leash. Still undomesticated.

Stand And Fight... Or Walk Away

2008-04-24T05:07:00.000-07:00

Some choose to stand and fight
Some choose to walk away
Carrying on isn't always bravado
Walking away isn't always giving up.

It is what you are fighting for that matters
It is where you are walking to that is important
To each his own, brave fight or nonchalant walk
In the end, they are both experiences you'll learn from.

Whether you choose to fight or walk away
You'll live to learn another day
Sometimes doing battle is actually walking away
Sometimes walking away is actually staying in the fight.

Some choose to stand and fight
Some choose to walk away
Carrying on isn't always bravado
Walking away isn't always giving up, I know.

How old are you?

2007-10-23T00:21:00.000-07:00

Are you being pushed down?

They say 60s are the new 50s.
People are working till they’re well over 65. What happened to I am just going to start getting my pension and enjoy a happy retired life at 58.

They say 50s are the new 40s.
People are still venturing out on their own at 55. What happened to just getting ready to welcome my grandson and enjoy the last 30 years of work I’ve put in.

They say 40s are the new 30s.
People are having their first kid at 45. What happened to I’m just getting used to my teenage daughters mood swings and learning to cope.

They say 30s are the new 20s.
People are going back to school at 35. What happened to phew, I’m just done with studying and waiting to soar in a corporate career.

Or

Are you being pulled up?

They say 10s are the new 20s
Children are fooling around with the latest gadgets at 15. What happened to I just got home from school mom, I wanna go out and play.

They say new borns are the new 10s? (WTF)
Toddlers are walking around abusing their chuddy buddies at 5. What happened to I just want to impress everyone with my nursery rhyme, 1 to 100 and A-Z repeating skills.

So I guess that means the 20s are the most screwed up with 30 years of your life being lived in what actually are just 10 years. So you’ll never know how old you are.

I am 26. Or am I?

Programmed

2007-10-06T03:28:00.000-07:00

10 Alarm rings
20 Hit snooze
30 Alarm rings again
40 Turn it off

50 Rub eyes
60 Sit up
70 Finish chores
80 Get in car

90 Drive
100 Curse traffic
110 Drive
120 Curse traffic
130 Park at office

140 Talk to clients
150 Talk to colleagues
160 Talk to vendors
170 Lunch
180 Talk to clients
190 Talk to colleagues
200 Talk to vendors

210 Get in car
220 Goto 90
230 Finish cursing traffic
240 Park at home

250 Try to open door quietly
260 Serve self
270 Eat
280 Set alarm
290 Sleep
300 Goto 10

Programmed. For life.
Hail Andy and Larry Wachowski.

Where can I find my red pill. *sigh*

Sigh!

2007-10-02T21:08:00.001-07:00

I liked my meat pink. Now I gotta eat red.
I liked my triangular walking track. Now its shaped like an apostrophe! (WTF!)
I liked following that cute little boy. Now I walk alone.
I liked having a name that at least sounded like one of my kind. Now, its not even like a name any more. (More like a question, beat that!)
I liked being Indian. Now I'm supposed to have become all international.
One fine day, pronunciamento - I am now someone else :(
I liked being there. Now, I wonder what the future holds.

Thanks for listening.

- Hutch, the Pug.
P.S. And they say, change is good.

What if

2007-09-27T00:56:00.000-07:00

Sreesanth had dropped that "2-million-dollar-with-one-crore-for-Yuvraj-5-10lakh-for-may-
others-from-state-governments-and-so-much-more" catch.

Misbah had hit that "i-can-do-an-Ashraful-i-can-be-cute-in-victory-all-shall-see-my-'bat'-of-
steel" shot right.

Rohit hadn't made those "1-six-and-2-fours-made-all-the-difference-in-the-end-i'll-take-the-
onus-of-the-final-surge" thirty runs.

Afridi had connected that "slow-between-the-fingers-it-so-should've-gone-for-six- this-was-the- one-time-that-i-skied-it" delivery from Irfan.

Yes, I am a "screamed-myself-hoarse-hugged-the-life-outta-my-colleagues-danced-
like-there-was-no-tomorrow-sat-at-the-same-place-i-was-sitting-when-
a-wicket-fell" kind of fan.
Yes, I do love this "no-time-to-think-wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am-lets-hit-it-out-
of-the-park" version of entertainment (note:NOT sport).
And yes, I know what matters is this historic "we-beat-them-although-not-so-hollow-and-now-every-Indian-is-
singing-our-praises-and-we-shall-now-get-a-lot-of-endorsements" victory.

But, what if.... *shudder*...

I've been converted

2007-05-12T05:42:00.000-07:00

From a Bill disciple to a Steve follower.

The months of cursing why a new key had to be used to do (or rather undo!) regular stuff ("apple" Z instead of the oh-so-familiar "Ctrl" Z) have given way to a time spent admiring the beauty of how this delicate looking, robust, piece of metal - and so much more - works. It is nothing short of phenomenal. Before I ramble on, here's what's got me back to my keyboard after almost a year long hiatus from writing (for reasons not just limited to the lack of owning this).

The (wait-for-it) MacBook Pro.

In the last one month since I've been hooked to this device I've discovered the joys of not seeing "Error #692 - you have a programme running which has affected some sectors in your hard disk and there's nothing we can do about it" and "some unforeseen error has caused Microsoft Word to shut down and any unsaved data may be lost". This apart, I know what it feels like when something doesn't hang on you (no pun intended there). And when something doesn't take forever to happen when you do a Ctrl S or a Ctrl Z (which are also functions of a lot of other things too - but while I'm stuck on blowing my Mac trumpet, lemme take this case-in-point too).

Its become the object of my affection in the last one month and it has made my life a lot easier too. And when the first laptop you have happens to be an Apple MacBook Pro, it takes a lot to keep you from bragging :-) I'm hoping that the comfort of sitting (more like sleeping right now with feet in the air on a stack of cushions and a head stand of a bed for a head rest) with a slick 1 inch wide, 2 and a half kilo machine makes me a lot more regular in my postings. A dining table chair to sit on and type at the end of a long days work does not make too much of an inviting proposition, you see.

For all you guys who wish you had this, find an organization that loves you :-) (like mine), or if you have the moolah to spend (which I couldn't afford right now), then go get one yourselves.

A for Apple now has a new meaning :-) In my life at least.

Boyopause

2006-06-13T03:45:00.000-07:00

Is 25 too early to get philosophical? Is 25 too late to still not know where you're headed?
Is 25 too early to consider marriage? Is 25 too late to still not have found your soulmate?
Is 25 too early to book your own house? Is 25 too late to still not have moved out of your parents home?
Is 25 too early to want to retire? Is 25 too late to still not have started planning your retirement?
Is 25 too early to start reading spiritualistic stuff? Is 25 too late to still not have gone beyond Asterix and Tintin?
Is 25 too early to be watching Baba Ramdev's yoga demos? Is 25 too late to still not have stopped watching Cartoon Network?
Is 25 too early to want to go to the Himalayas? Is 25 too late to still not have have seen even half of the city you live in?
Is 25 too early to think you are losing hair? Is 25 too late to still not have worried about hair loss?
Is 25 too early to reflect on what you've done in life? Is 25 to late to still not be bothered by life around you?
Is 25 too early to want to stop making new friends? Is 25 too late to still not have stopped exchanging numbers with almost everyone you meet?
Is 25 too early to be meeting Owners and Directors of companies? Is 25 too late to still not have gone past the Assistant to the Assistant to the Assistant of the Assistant Manager's office?
Is 25 too early to want to start off your own thing? Is 25 too late to still not have found your feet where you've been working for 3 years?
Is 25 too early to be writing something like this? Is 25 too late have not thought of all the stuff above?

Fortunately, or should I say unfortunately, its never too late or too early to be 25. One fine day, you just are 24 no more.

The Journey? ... The End?

2006-05-09T04:58:00.000-07:00

The journey, not the destination
Is what they say there is to it.
The efforts, not the outcome
Is what they say that matters
The process, not the results
Is what they say is important
The means, not the end
Is what they say we need to figure out.

Is there nothing at this forever changing destination
Is there no joy when the outcome is favourable
Is there no ecstasy when the result is fruitful
Is there no satisfaction at achieving "an end"?

Why is it that we still want to get there
Why is it that we still want an outcome
Why is it that results do matter
Why are we still chasing an end?

The journey you make, the fun is there to choose.
The destination you may know not, it just may not matter
The efforts you put in, do your best
The outcome you may know not, it just may not affect you
The process you lay down, enjoy while you do it
The results you may know not, don't even bother
The means you can make honest, being true is upto you
The end you may know not, you might'nt even be around.

Kabhi lagta hai

2006-04-29T00:57:00.000-07:00

Kabhi lagta hai,
Tum theher gaye ho,
ruk gaye ho.
Ya shaayad
Duniya aage chal padi hai,
daud padi hai.
Kya sach, kya jhooth
Tumhein yun kuredti,
Aisi woh nishthur ghadi hai.

Kabhi lagta hai
Rahon mein kaheen,
Meet tumhein chhod gaye.
Ya shaayad
Tum hi kahin,
unhein chhod aaye
Ab sab tanha hai.
Hazaaron sawaal poochta,
Aisa woh ziddi lamha hai.

Kabhi lagta hai
Hawa ne rukh badla,
Is liye mushkilein aayeen.
Ya shaayad
Disha tum hi ne badli,
Anischit tumhaara hi mann tha.
Galat tum the yeh hawaayein,
Is kashmakash mein tumhein dubota
Aisa woh nirdayi kshan hai.

Kabhi lagta hai,
Zindagi tumhaare saath
khel rahi hai.
Ya shaayad
Tumhi ne zindagi ke saath
Kiya chhal hai.
Kya is prashna ka uttar milega,
Yeh poochta, mujhe ghoorta
Aisa woh ajeeb pal hai.

(Hope to put it up in Devnagri :) )

Three word theory

2006-04-24T23:07:00.000-07:00

Think about it. All you need. Just three words. Three's a crowd? I think not. Not with words. Three's just right. Say a little. Say a lot. Say something nice. Say something nasty. Give an instruction.Take an order. Just exchange greetings. Say your hellos. Say your goodbyes. Go recruit someone. Go fire someone. Chant a prayer. Utter an abuse. Ask for forgiveness. Say something profound. Say something memorable. Say something forgettable. Make a brand. Destroy a reputation. Spare a moment. You will realise. Three are enough. More than enough. Maybe one less. Maybe one more. But that's it. I'll show you. So here goes.

How are you? I am fine. What about you? I'm doing good. I love you. Love you too. Stop the mush! Get a life! Go to hell! Peace, peace, peace. Divorce, divorce, divorce. Those in hindi. Work is worship. Speak the truth. Keep the faith. Never say never. Change is permanent. Nothing else matters. Sad but true. Words of wisdom? Thanda matlab Coca-cola. Just do it. Awesone, weren't they? I agree too. Let's move on.

He's the culprit. Call the cops. Take him in. One phone call. Call my lawyer. Court is adjourned. Invoke divine intervention. Om Jai Jagdish. Buddham Sharanam Gachami. Allah Hu Akbar. He is innocent. Yes, I'm free. I'll sue you. Congratulations to you. The job's yours. We have expectations. You'll do well. We are sure. You want leave? You've just joined. You're screwing up. Please forgive me. One more chance. No, thats it. You are fired. That's too bad. I just quit.

Funny isn't it? Just weird maybe. Even think expletives. For that matter. In any language. English, Hindi Marathi. Or any other. Write them here? Are you crazy? My parents read. But, think aloud. Three is awesome. Abuse a little. Abuse a lot. Get it out. It feels good. Does it not? What say you? Laugh out loud. That feels good. I'm pretty sure. God is great. Praise the lord. Such is life. It goes on. So keep smiling. Love you all.

Just an afterthought. Leave a comment :) Wasn't anything profound? Read it anyways? Thanks for reading. I stop here. And bid adieu. I'll keep writing. Amen, to that.

Sad but true

2006-04-20T00:40:00.000-07:00

Reality bites.

And chews. And swallows. And Digests. And then shits all the crap right in your face.

Its been established (by me :)) that Reality has a form, a shape, a brain, a heart and a soul. Oh, and a digestive system too. And lives with with one purpose only. To hurt you. And I believe that's his (for now, I'm unable to take a call on the gender yet) role in this big bad universe. Life as we know it depends on how equipped, or ill-equipped we are to take on Reality, Our Tormentor. Nothing new. Nothing profound. But I shall theorize anyway.

With weapons of pain, suffering, poverty, disease, heart ache, death - the list is endless - he launches attack after scathing attack, crushing the very spirit of human existence. It is upto to us which battles we win, and which ones we lose. The war shall anyway be a lost cause. For it is he who shall have the last laugh when he sees us consigned to flames, buried six feet under or thrown to feed hungry scavengers, or whatever way it is that we have to go. But go we shall. Not he. He will live to fight another day. Reality as I have deciphered as of now is immortal. But its the live-to-fight-another-day lesson that we need to learn from him. Fight and win our daily battles. And though go we must, it shall be with a smile. The choice of not giving him the satisfaction to see us go unhappy lies with us. And thats what shall make a difference.

Dictionary.com defines reality as
1. The quality or state of being actual or true.
2. The totality of all things possessing actuality, existence, or essence.
3. That which exists objectively and in fact.

I found these definitions lacking in explaining a lot of things, because I probably question the "absolute" basis for these definitions. I find that most references to Reality are always with some negative connotation (could be flawed personal perspective, but then this IS MY post), or quite abstract .

Reality sucks. Random general usage.
Negative connotation?
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert Einstein.
Abstract? Fathomable yet somewhat distant?

Isn't it ironic that references or usages that have to do with reality are so abstract? Why is it that even the definitions of something "real" are not "concrete" (for want of a better word) enough. I know I'm probably heading towards a Matrixesque spin here. But then I'm not talking about a movie. Truth is, there’s got to be SOMEONE (Something maybe?) named reality on whom we can all pin the blame of the battles that we lose. Which is why, He must exist. Comfortable cushion. Isn't it.

In the words of a very dear friend (avid Metallica fan, at that time, dunno about now) who had these words as solace for every difficult situation we encountered - Sad but true.

"Happiness is just an illusion caused by the temporary absence of reality."
- Anonymous
Once again. Sad, but true.

Ork(AP)ut!

2006-04-18T06:30:00.000-07:00

Scrap Back. Keep Scrappin. Scrap and lemme know. Buzz words that seem to have swarmed the world wide web. And how. Orkut has arrived. And from the looks of it, it's here to stay. So now, more and more people will spend hours and hours in front of the computer screen surfing the internet looking for old "friends" as they scout friend network after network, community after community writing "scraps". How thoughtful, isn't it that those words you leave behind are called "scraps".(Waste? Anyone?). I might come across as cynical :) which is what you are probably thinking as you read this (and I am to some extent), but I believe my conclusions are more an outcome of logical reasoning than just pure skepticism.

Man is a social animal,and in your lifespan you probably end up 'meeting' at least ten thousand people (could include your sweeper, pizza delivery guy, daily bus travel dude / dudette, someone you met at a college festival,). You end up making somewhere around 1000 to 2000 aquaintences (that would include your batch at School, Junior College, Graduation and Post Graduation, the people on your floor at work, etc). You have say a hundred friends (your 'groups' in School, Junior College, Graduation, Coaching Classes,etc.). And then maybe you'll have around 10, maybe 20, maybe 30 really close friends (the people whom you think you can call at midnight if you were in a soup).

Now, I believe that the people who fall in the last category, you would anyways call or be in touch with over mail on a regular basis. The people who fall in the third category, you would meet online, exchange pleasantries on chat, mail if something of importance comes up, etc. The second category you would bump into at alumni meets, or if you happen to be in the same sphere of work then a freak meeting is somewhere in store. Would you really want a regular update on what each one is doing, how much each one is earning. The occasional bumping into is just fine I say. How much difference would regular knowing about this lot make to your life anyway? And with respect to the first category, I'm sure you wouldn't exchange more than a half smile when you see them a second or a third time.

Nothing will ever change with your really close friends. But now that Orkut is here, the other three categories are going to see some flux. You will start helloing these people with warm smileys, curiously enquire about who is doing what and where and gossip about the relationship status of every Tom,Dick and Harry you ever saw. Nothing makes juicier talk than who was with whom for how long and why they aren't together anymore. Does it? I do not mean to and will never disrespect anyone in the third category. But with regards to the aquaintences and the 'meet' variety, ask me one question thats out of bounds and you'll surely get a WTF from me. In an age when we know for a fact that more than 90% (or is it more than that?) of all information that we process everyday is virtually useless, why add to the garbage dump in our heads? Would you rather not read a book, or for that matter go meet (for real! not a virtual meeting!!) a friend who really matters or do something nice for your mom!! But NO. Its time to go orkutting is what the world on the internet seems to be saying.

The communities are probably the biggest positive (and the biggest negative at the same time) that Orkut offers. I say so from a purely professional/meaningful perspective. Like minded people can have forums to discuss problems and get solutions. Math freaks can share problems with other Math geniuses, Designers can discuss photoshop and corel problems and get help from someone in the community who is experienced and has an answer that you might not have and so on. At the same time these communities can be and are misused by a number of anti-social elements out there. Racist communities are established, communities are established for nation bashing, hate communities are established against individuals or groups and none of these are EVER going to do any good to society.

Maybe if this were started and run as a pure business network, Or at least if people happened to use it with a little more restraint, Or if people had the sense and the etiquette to know whom to ask what, then I would see some sense to it. And despite all the stuff that I've written above, I AM on orkut, with the hope that it will someday serve some purpose that shall make a difference in my professional or personal life. That an orkut 'connection' somehwere either helps crack a business deal or maybe help get someone from a matching blood group for a relative/friend in need. ( I'm an optimist at heart you see. A cynic is what the world has made me :-) )

For now though, I'll just stay put. And if my belief changes over time (i.e when the cynic in me beats the crap out of the optimist in me), then it shall be time to go Ork(AP)ut!!

Lata Maange "woh" kar

2006-03-29T03:22:00.000-08:00

The voice that brought tears to Nehru's eyes now speaks the language of irrationality. Is it just senile dementia or is it celebrity tantrums at its best. The lady who crooned "Ae mere watan ke logon, zaraa aankh mein bharlo paani. Jo shaheed hue hain unki, zaraa yaad karo qurbaani", has no intention of making a "qurbaani" (just trying to see her perspective - though I wouldn't call it sacrifice!).

The civic body responsible for infrastructure concludes that it is important to have a flyover in an area where traffic problems are as certain as your visit to the shit-pot every morning. It could have been anywhere in this vehicle-infested-suffering-from-uncontrolled-traffic city. Now it so happens that the area earmarked for the flyover happens to run past the home of the lady whose voice is synonymous with music, melody, soul. And she responds with a cacophony expected by none ( I guess). Demands of not going ahead with the proposal of constructing the flyover or facing the consequences - she would leave the city. Childish? Immature? or is it just the desire to play bully? Maybe she didn't get to do it as she grew up (I'd like to think otherwise though, maybe a certain younger sister would concur). I think she's pushing 75 and I thought people get wiser with age. This situation was a no-brainer and for an almost 75 year old to react in such a manner was almost ridiculous. Add to that her financial ability to buy a house almost anywhere in the world and you ask, why o why?

I normally don't talk about how fast someone would kick the bucket, but I think I'll make an exception. Why would you want to create such a ruckus with one foot in the grave?! You know you aren't going to be around maybe 5, or 10, or 15 years from now. Shouldn't you be considerate enough to think of how much the traffic problem could escalate in that much time if these remedial measures aren't taken now. People will remember you for the good you do, not for the obstacles you create. Celebrities could actually use their status for the larger good of society. I honestly don't know if she has ever done anything for the benefit of society. It's alright if she hasn't too. Seriously. But at least try not to get in the way of people trying to do their job. And what's with the threat? Leave the city? It's not like she's going to take all the oxygen in the air with her. It actually would be sad if the Government takes a step back to give in to such an irrational demand, albeit from such a well known personality.

I'm actually unsure whether the Government would rather bend backwards to placate one stubborn individual or do something thats critical for smooth traffic in a crowded area of the city. Actually I have this inner voice (that's been speaking a lot these days :) ; ref: previous post) that tells me that it's the individuals tantrums that shall get attention. After all, when it comes to such issues its only the strings that can be pulled that matter. And old as she may be, there are a lot of strings that this woman can pull. Besides, there are a number of sycophantic idiots who wouldn't mind carrying people and vehicles across the stretch in front of her home so that the noise and honking does not disturb her, who are in places of power. And these people will definitely ensure this dust that she has manged to rake up does not settle without a favourable result. For her, that is.

I wish her peace. In hell. Where the foundations of the flyover that shall be built (there will come a time, when it will get built) shall reverbate with the abuses that people who are travelling on the flyover hurl at each other. And each of those abuses shall be magnfied tenfold with a name suffixed to it - Lata Mangeshkar.

Of God and man

2006-03-21T22:58:00.000-08:00

If cricket is a religion, Sachin is GOD.
And I would be lying if I said I didn't worship him. From the desert storm the Aussies faced in Sharjah in 1998, to the sound, resilient knock after the passing away of a loved one - albeit against Kenya in 1999 World Cup, to the blitzkrieg against Shoaib and co. at Centurion in the 2003 World Cup, each of these moments has a special place in my memory, just as it would for any Sachin fan.

The brilliance is there no doubt. But it wasn't praises all the way right from the start. An average debut in 1989 versus Pakistan at Karachi. A decent first couple of years in his Test career. Among the lot of cricketers who took the most number of matches to get his first century in ODIs. And then to the current status of more than 10000 Test runs and 50 International hundreds. Somewhere along this journey, there was a transition. This man went from being mortal to being God.

To err is human, to never err divine. The one BIG problem with being God. NO room for error. If you are proclaimed Hero/ Leader/ King / Emperor, you are still human and are permitted mistakes. It also gives your subjects an opportunity to raise their voice, revolt, plan a mutiny, or even overthrow their king for that matter. A Maharaja of Indian cricket we know would definitely second this belief. This is where I think we as fans, and the media, need to see that thin line of difference. The difference between being a Hero and being God. Heroes go down in blazes of glory, Heroes become martyrs, Heroes sometimes fail when the odds are heavily stacked against them, there is an "end" so to speak in such references. None so, when it comes to God.

Sachin was booed of Wankhede. It was almost like Lord Ganesh being unseated from Siddhivinayak, Lord Venkateshwara Balaji being unseated from Tirupati, Lord Krishna being unseated from an ISKON temple, Lord.... so on.. I hope you get the drift. Sheer blasphemy. The only reason, Sachin is GOD. This where I probably have started (please note the "probably", that is the only written indicator I can give to the tremendous conflict of belief that I am facing as I write this) questioning, whether we need to reasses how we and the media go about making Gods out of human beings. Maybe if we just let them be our heroes, their names won't be tarnished and such acts of blasphemy shall never be committed again. I for one, would not condone such acts. And such acts against Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar. Never.

Even as I sign off after having made what I hope is a strong attempt at striking a "practical" chord, I hear this voice from within that says, "Forgive him God, for he knows not what he is doing."It needs no telling, which God I am referring to.

Bus. Bas Ho Gaya!

2006-03-04T21:56:00.000-08:00

There are times when travel excites you, there are times when travel is just something you got to do, there are times when you just don't want to travel, there are times when you hate having to go through the entire travel experience, there are times when you absolutely, most certainly loathe the very idea of having to travel and then there is that brand of travel that evokes a feeling thats hard to describe. I'll give it a shot. A daily trip home from my place of work (Powai) to home.

To experience this particular brand of travel you would need to ensure that you are at the place of commencement of journey (Powai Vihar Bus Stop) at anytime between 7pm and 830pm, give and take 15 minutes. Anything more than that and your experience is likely to be a diluted one. So be there or be spared.

Powai Vihar Bus Stop. Dark place. One pole for a bus stop. The headlights of oncoming traffic and the neon glow of the "Ajahara" glowsign being the only sources of light. "Ajahara" probably has installed so many pest repellant machines that they have ensured that every possible species of insect in its vicinity crosses the road and makes itself at home precisely at the bus stop. Its a different story altogether that you will hardly ever find any human presence in that shop other than the employees. (Maybe they gotta rethink what they've installed as repellant).

The Beginning
Buses that pass you at this hour could be classified on the basis of the number of people they have on the footboard. (Step-People Classification) 3-3: 3 people on the 3rd step. 3-1: 1 person on the 3rd step. 2-2 : 2 people on the second step. Given my upbringing and safety guidelines spelt out from home, I do not attempt to go for anything greater than a 2-2. This situation is made even more complex by the number of people you have waiting at the bus stop. For eg: when there are four people at the bus stop attempting to board the same bus as you a 2-2 bus will immediately become a 3-3 if all four get to the bus before you, and it becomes unboardable (oh, did I forget to mention there is no such thing as a queue). So you just wait and watch. Fortunately, almost all buses heading to Mulund from Andheri (thats where I get off, the last stop) pass through Powai Vihar, so I have quite a few buses to choose from. Actually, it gives a large number of buses to just not attempt boarding.

The Journey
After letting go about 5-6 buses over a period of 15-20 pest-stricken, mosquito-bitten minutes frustration sets in. This, with having to scratch at a bite on your back and the area of leg just above your sock which one sickly mosquito has managed to fly upto and suck, both at the same time. Life is about tough choices they say, and I make this choice every single day of finally picking a 2-1 bus, that lets you have this momentary joy of knowing that "Ah! I'm on my way home". The first 2-3 minutes are alright. You are practically outside the bus, the wind in your face and it reeaches the curve that marks the beginning of the IIT campus. For those who came in late (God bless Lee Falk), IIT is HUGE, the entire stretch of road from the right turn after the Hiranandani right until the right you take to start the descent on the Gandhi Nagar slope runs along the IIT campus wall. This stretch is one of those historic stretches in bus journey folk lore and I'm sure every IT engineer worth his salt who has travelled from SEEPZ to Mulund on his way home and has encountered this stretch would agree.

It's here that the next-to-undescribable experience begins. You've managed to move up the steps and are now in the aisle at the rear end of the bus. You buy your ticket (I am still trying to find reason, as to what I'm paying for), and the musical rendition of the bus conductors favourite song, begins to play in an loop (this goes on for what actually seems like infinity). "Madhle chala pudhe..Chala madhle pudhe" intermittent musical accompaniment with the banging of his ticket checking instrument on the roof of the bus, on the bus seats, on the door frame, on the window, on his ticket box.. You Name It!! "Madhle chala pudhe.. Chala madhle pudhe".. As you move along the aisle the "trip" begins. Three rows of people with arms raised, bags slung over shoulders, leaning all over each other,coupled with the rocking Mumbai weather has everyones sweat gands working overtime. The vehicles too seem to have taken it upon themselves to prove their dominance over the human race with the exhausts of vehicles spitting out every single gas known to man, this ensuring the sweat glands respond even more vehemently. The dust and dirt on the roads of Mumbai that are part of this complete symphony need no mention.

The air is completely filled with a complex mixture of everything that all of the above have spewed. Inhale and experience! It makes your nasal hair stand on end, then double up and fall over and then you can almost hear it wish that it had germinated in the safer confines of your armpit than be exposed to the savage death gases that it was responsible for filtering to keep you alive. Thank you, Nasal Hair!! Snorters, Dopers, Smokers... Try this for a change. I can't say its any less harmful (we'll know when we've done an examination of my lungs a few years from now), but it takes you to another level. You gradually learn to play God, 'coz if forgiving is divine, then I AM GOD. Smelly folks, honking folks, leaning folks, screaming folks.. I've forgiven them all. You are destined to travel this stretch of about a km or a bit more for nothing less than 15 whole minutes, that too if you are reasonably lucky. On any other day, its a sure shot 25. Liberating.

The Arrival
Once you cross Gandhi Nagar, the conductors rhyme actually seems to start working and people move. By the time the bus reaches Kanjur Station you finally are able to see the lights on the road outside the bus. The air gradually begins to clear and the driver finally gets to move the bus into gears that probably were itching to get into action. With the bus picking up speed, the wind clearing out the gas chamber that was, the levels of oxygen pick up and its actually a new high altogether. God is kind. The arrival of Bhandup station quite often results in you getting a place to rest your a**. Thats when the feeling of what you have just fought and won begins to sink in. Victory is sweet. "Mulund Check Naka" announces the conductor and you step out of the bus with your chest stuck out.

You've won the battle won.You've saved the day.And you most certainly will live to fight another day.

A Generation: Shaken AND Stirred.

2006-02-01T08:24:00.000-08:00

I'm no movie critic and this is not a movie review, but Bollywood is back in business. I came out after watching an Amir Khan film that's not an Amir Khan film. In fact I came out after watching a month or so in the lives of DJ, Aslam, Karan, Sukhi, Laxman Pandey, Sue and Sonia. And I would be lying if I said I didn't come out with a lump in my throat. For probably the first time I do not remember a movie for a role an actor played, or for how well a particular actor or actress acted, or for how good the dialogues were. I remember it for a film as a whole, a story well told, a point well made, a sermon well delivered and the bottom line - a job well done. Salutations Mr. Mehra!

Inspiring. A strong word in todays times. A strong word in any times. But you know you are inspired when you - a normal (I hope my parents, friends, acquaintences, colleagues will vouch for that) average 25 year old - feel like picking a weapon and killing someone for the wrong that's happening in the country today. I know that's not the solution and I know that's pretty idealistic a picture to paint. But honestly, an alarm clock isn't going to be good enough to wake a nation that's in such deep slumber. It is going to need a gunshot. And that's where I think Mr. Mehra has hit the nail right on its head. Not that I'm saying what we need out there is armed youth on a killing spree. But we need drastic measures.

The sorry part is, today, we all have become cynics; not what we are; but, what we have become. And though the degree of cynicsm may vary from person to person that's what we are also making everyone who comes in contact with us. I'm the first one to put my hand and take the blame for this dirty, stinking, vicious circle of filth that we've all built around our worlds. But that's just not good enough. Something needs to be done. And fast. Somewhere deep within us is an idealist who can dream of and build utopia. Somewhere deep within is a person who has beliefs and will fight for each and every of thos beliefs. Lets find that person deep within and show him the way out.

Will you stand "ek paon past mein, ek paon future mein" and pee all over today, or are you gonna put your feet together and stand upright for what you believe.
Will you continue to live in the matrix will or you face your Agent Smith's and tell him it's time to get a life "penn de takkon".
Will you say good night and just go to bed or will you stop and say good morning to a new beginning.

I don't know. And the reason I don't is because the cynic in me still lives. We need to kill that cynic inside first. Maybe you out there will do a better job of it and show me the way. Till then, I guess I'll just write. Amen.

Where's your crown King Nothing.

2005-12-22T04:51:00.000-08:00

And it all crashes down
And you break your crown
And you point your finger
But there's no one around

Just want one thing
Just to play thing king
But the castle crumbled
And you're left with just a name

Where's your crown?
King Nothing

- Metallica: "Load", 1996

Circa 2005.
That's practically the ode the Indian selectors would have scripted had they decided to pen one. Say hello to the world of Saurav Chandidas Ganguly. His throne seized, his kingdom revamped and his subjects who hailed him, now singing the praise of a "Wall". Reams and reams of newsprint and bytes, megabytes and gigabytes of webspace have been dedicated to the ouster of "the Maharaja" of Indian cricket. A story that has hogged the headlines for the fortnight gone by and at least for the fortnight to come. Too much noise made I would say given that all thats happened is that a man (although high-profile and always in the limelight) lost his job.

I think its just the way things are made out to be rather than how they actually are (rather how they actually should be made out to be) that has caused this entire uproar. Would like to state upfront that I am one of the most ardent admirers of this man's magical touch when it comes to timing the cricket ball. At the same time I am not exactly one who advocates the "cricketers-on-a-pedestal" kind of picture that is painted of certain cricketers on the Indian cricket scene. Given the current scenario in the world today, cricket is another profession. Its much beyond being just a sport and the players are no longer just sportsmen, they're professionals. So then who's to say that just because he is the most successful captain in Indian cricketing history gives him the liberty of performing poorly in more number of matches than any other cricketer in the team. The bottom line being that, he's just another professional with a job and he has to deliver.

Statistics would indeed reflect that this man did not deserve a place in the ODI squad for sometime coming now. But I guess thanks to the forces that were(They no longer are in now) his stay with the team was extended. It's this basic problem of this larger than the team, larger than cricket, and larger than life aura that the media has created around some of the faces of Indian cricket that has resulted in these non-issues becoming first page headlines when there are definitely other pressing national issues that need coverage. I know I'll probably draw a lot of flak, abuses and a punch in the face the next time a reader meets me, for saying this, but if anyone is not performing, action has to be taken, even if the non-performer happens to be Sachin Tendulkar. A place in the Indian cricket team cannot and must never be taken for granted. You perform, you are in. You fail, you are out. That should be it. Your name/suraname shouldn't guarantee you the visa extension that you get for cricketing tours, your past scores should.

To top the follies of the Board and the System, you have a stateful of crazy supporters who have already in the past shown their level of maturity and respect for the game (Semi-Final of the World-cup,1996, Ind v/s Sri Lanka). These people go to the extent of almost calling for a state bandh in response to this selection decision. If that were done every single time a Bengali working with some MNC or any organisation somewhere in the world was suspended/fired/asked to resign from his job, Bengal would have a yearful of Holidays. A man lost his job 'coz he did not deliver. Its a tough world. People get fired. You work hard and find a new job. Life goes on. Everyone out there is doing (or is at least expected to do) a job. The selectors, the curators, the umpires, the members of the Board, the players have got to do their job. NO ONE is bigger than the sport itself. The sport has produced many a mercurial batsmen and many a legendary bowler. There shall always be names that shall be synonymous with greatness in the game. There shall always be amazing stories that are narrated from the annals of cricket. But NONE greater that the sport itself.

The crown's been taken, But all is not lost. There's a lot of cricket left in the man. 3-4 years at least. And I'm sure Lady Luck will certainly smile upon him. Someone's bound to get injured, fall ill. All he needs to do is have numbers that will back him at that point in time. And I'm sure he'll live up to his moniker of the "Bengal Tiger" once again. He WILL roar his way back into the team. After all, the sport is a great leveller. The levelling wave worked against him this time around, but when the next wave hits the shores of Indian cricket I'm sure the Maharaaja will ride it all the way to the top.

This ones to the great sport of cricket.
Cheers!

P.S.
Just for the statistically inclined, the record of the five batsman of the Indian ODI squad from Jan ' 04 to Dec ' 05

M Runs Avg Highest 100's 50's 0's N.O.'s SR
Saurav 43 1134 28.35 90 0 8 3 3 66.82
Sehwag 53 1515 29.71 108 1 8 3 2 101.13
Sachin 37 1224 34.97 141 2 7 1 2 79.12
Yuvraj 57 1680 35.00 139 4 8 1 9 85.28
Kaif 44 1262 40.71 102* 1 8 1 13 74.90
Decide for yourself.

The most "circulated" daily.

2005-12-06T21:53:00.000-08:00

Honestly, I didn't know whether to have the word 'most', the word 'circulated' or the word 'daily' in quotes when I named this post. But felt that circulated was probably the most 'deserving'. Now, in trying to make the morning newspaper such an enjoyable experience, India's most read daily, has added the Mumbai Mirror as part of the huge stack of papers the newspaper boy delivers at your doorstep. So make that the main supplement, the Bombay Times, the Mumbai Mirror, your local 'plus' (Thane, Mulund, New Bombay, Andheri,etc.) and some fifth supplement (The Education Times, Times Ascent, Top Drive -depending on which day it is).

Good morning India! You pick up the newspaper with your daily cup of tea and begin reading. You get through the first couple of pages quite quickly - (Hell.. All there is whether the jejunal infection that has resulted in the shortening of the intestine of I dare say, an amazingly famous Indian will affect his ability to work in the future and of course, the list of all the glitterati who have been making the rounds of the hospital with photographs to match). This issue probably demands a post in itself, but I would be lying if I said that I wasn't a fan of the man in question, although its gotten to my head as to how much an issue like this can boost newspaper sales - I don't think newspaper reporting today or 'journalism' in general has any other purpose. Cases in Point - "the Mid-day Mate" (What in the world!!! Part of a news daily??!!), Last page of the Bombay Times, or should I just say - the Bombay Times, etc. Anyways, these debates for some other post.

Getting back, you browse through the news in your city and the sports section and you arrive at the Times Imternational.As you go through the Times International you glance through the 'graffitti' section. You happen to read about Halle Berry's decisions on never marrying again after 2 failed ones, Paris Hilton's decision to marry her current boyfriend, Jessica Simpson announcing the end of her marriage, Elton John telling all on his plans to solemnise his gay relationship by marrying his partner and so on. Intriguing. Enjoyable gossip. It just made my tea a lot more fun to sip I must say. End of the Times International and you arrive at your daily quota of what could be called "official gossip" - the Bombay Times. You reach the last couple of pages and.. Voila!! Here we Halle expressing her loss of faith in the institution of marriage again. Hmmm.. Now did we just read that or did she just get through her third marriage that fast!! And there you go..You have Paris looking up at you announcing her marriage-to-be..Has she run through her previous boyfriend as well??!! Whatever..You leave those thoughts aside and pick up your Mumbai Mirror, You again reach the film news / gossip section and ... Boy is Halle frustrated or what!!! No marraige for her yet again!!!! Aaaawwww!! And Paris wants
to marry. Hurray!!! An exhausting read I must say. Wasn't it?? The examples sighted here are just a trailer. DON'T take my word for it. Pick up the newspaper tomorrow morning and see for yourself. You'll get the complete picture. Gets the blood circulating faster than you can say "beep". And this, phenomenon you shall often notice spread over a couple of days as well. Hey..Jessica divorced today? I thought that was three days ago. Or did she have a 72 hour marriage after that as well.

Was just wondering what it is that prompts this daily to "circulate" the same piece of news in three different sections of their own paper. Is once not enough? Is it that people want to see Halle, Paris and the girls again and again?? Or do they think all their readers have short term memories (REAL SHORT at that). Or is it plain lack of any other news to report. Mumbai Mirror having a repetition can probably, still be justified. After all, its a "separate" newspaper and soon might not be distributed with the Times. But the Times International and Bombay Times are for sure going to be part of your tea routine every morning. So then WHY!? And its not just this news. There are instances when you see this happening with the top stories as well. Read it in active voice in the Times and in Passive voice in the MM seems to be the mantra. I think this paper has been at the top long enough and its time they were told to treat us with a wee bit more respect.

Gossip / Sport / Business / Politics or Your Top Stories, I think reruns are still better left to television. For print, one story once a day is good enough.

Squeal YA No Squeal

2005-12-02T07:50:00.000-08:00

Welcome to the era of reality TV.

The Beginning: Star walks onto set. 20 wanna-be-lucky people surround him with boxes that have cards with amounts ranging from 25 paise to 1 crore written on them. One lucky fella (Lets call him Mr.A) is 'chosen' who shall push his luck and try hard (whatever that means given the game as you shall see it unfold!!) to win one crore. Mr.A comes sits opposite the star and now has the 'difficult' task of pointing out people whose boxes he wants opened and the prize money they hold to be eliminated. Each elimination enlightening him with what amount he DOES NOT have in his box. 5 boxes down. Our Mr. A has 'bravely' managed to eliminate amounts in the range of 25 paise to 10000 Rupees. Still giving him the hope that he has the 1 crore card in his box.

Ta da ding ting..Ta da ding ting..Ta da ding ting ting..A phone call from the "bank manager". Star conveys to Mr.A that the "bank" is offering him Rs.30,000 to buy his box. He has to decide "Deal YA No Deal". If he accepts the offer, the game ends, else Mr.A has a tough job ahead of pointing out to five more people whose boxes he wants opened and carry on. He valiantly decides to soldier on and with an emphatic Thumbs Down - NO DEAL. "Hum in bank waalon se nahi darenge. Yeh offer bekar hai". So much for tv soaps and hindi films!! The elimination and the bank offer story goes on for 4 rounds (18 boxes have been opened, an by now the only amounts left are 10 Lac and 50 Lac); and each time our Mr.A (who has gone from soldier to risk taker to devotee - there was a vaishnav devi song playing!!!- , to actor hugging people who opened boxes with low amounts to STAR with everyone in the audience rooting for him). Just one box to be opened and the 'bank' "offers" him 21 Lakh. Our hero is convinced that HIS is the box that has the 50 Lakh!!! X-ray vision or what!!! He also has his wife (from the audience) solemnly saying "aap to humesha hi risk lete aaye hain aur jeete hain" (is Subhash Ghai watching!!! OR should I say GET REAL WOMAN!!!). Box opened - Its 50 Lakh in the other box. Mr.A ha to return home with 10 Lakh. Hugs all around. Everest has been scaled yet again. Boy was that difficult!! The End.

We'll deal with the greed later (Dude!! Just take the 21 lakhs and leave!!). For now, I'm just wondering what television is feeding the viewers of today and what in the world are people hosting in the name of "game shows". TRP Ratings are being gained on the basis of an emotion a viewer feels for some unknown Tom (who by the way is not gonna give you a penny of the ten lakh or 1 crore that he wins) that is keeping him glued to his sofa. The KBC's and the Jeeto Chappad Phaad Ke's at least demand that you be knowledgeable (Level of knowledge is debateable). The Ek Minutes and the Tele-Matches tested some skills (nothing much to do with intellect, but stamina, speed, skill.. for what they were worth). What in the world was the game show above testing??? The ability to raise your finger and speak???!!!! "Main Box number 2 Kholna chahoonga". Hey.. Guess what??My 6 year old cousin can manage that. And boy would I be mad if he had 50 Lakhs in the bank at age 6!!! That too for doing what Mr.A did!!

Grow up people!! Both the makers of the show and the viewers who sit through the agonising 60 minutes of what Mr. A would do if his box wasn't gonna be having a card with enough money. Stick to watching the BBC Masterminds, ESPN Sports Quiz or just watch a soap (at least the actors are making an attempt at acting).

You try making me a "deal" of the above kind. Sorry brother. I'm out!!!

Hung over on yesterday's post

2005-11-23T07:56:00.000-08:00

For what its worth, "Life's like that"...

These thoughts cross your mind
They steal all the peace you have
It isn't good at all
It isn't good at all

They stick around too long
And wear you down to nothing
It isn't good at all
It isn't good at all

You wish they'd just go away
And not lead you astray
It isn't good at all
It isn't good at all

That's not one problem we're talking my friend
That's life for you, as long as you live
Its just NOT FAIR at all
Its just NOT FAIR at all

So, just deal with it old buddy
And take it on the chin, you'll see
It ain't that bad after all
It ain't that bad after all

Try fighting it and you mess things up
Just play along and live it up, you'll see
It ain't that bad after all
It ain't that bad after all

God bless you pal, and hope you're doing fine
Don't chuck it away, I bet you'll regret it, 'coz
It ain't worth that at all
It just ain't worth that at all

Of Death and Divorces

2005-11-22T10:31:00.000-08:00

I still do not know what it is thats prompting me to put these strange things that run around through the shambles of what I hope I can still call my mind down. But I guess these things are affecting me enough, if I still find it in me to sit at my computer and hit away at the keyboard after having spent the last two days at work.

Why is it that youngsters today are giving in so easily. Is life THAT bad? I don't think so.

A student at one of India's premier institute's committed suicide, and the matter was suppodedly hushed up for close to a week. Death attributed to pressure of not performing "within the system". I say so because the report said the student was known on campus as one among the networking gurus, comp geniuses, and nerd junta on campus. Also came to know that none of the faculty attended the funeral and neither was mourning observed on campus. We'll deal with the hypocritic bureaucracy some other time. This time around, the point not being why the matter was hushed or is it something to do with the way things work at a premier engineering institue; its about - whether there is anything in this world thats worth giving up your life for? I don't think so.

Divorce rates in India are skyrocketing. Numbers have gone up manifold in the last few years. What happened to the times where we believed that you married just once? I'm not 80 and do not advocate sticking to a bad marriage just because you were brought up being taught about the sanctity of the institution called marriage. But I still believe that its a sacred union of two people coming together (hopefully for a lifetime of happiness). Why is it then that things are changing so drastically? Is it that these reasons being cited today were there all along and its just that people are acting upon what they feel today ? OR Are people today being paired up so wrongly in the sacrosanct institution of marriage? I don't think so.

Both of the above mark an end. One of a glorious gift called life. And the other of a sense of belonging, a bond of love, a feeling of togetherness called marriage. What brings the generation of today to END both these really beautiful instituions? I call life an institution because it must have been one hell of a task for Him to come up with something as ingenius as life (for the atheists - it definitely takes a lot to make 206 bones, hundreds of muscles and so many organs work together in tandem). When we are incapable of handling such an institution, what in the world gives us the right to put an end to it? I'm not saying its easy. But I'm sure that there's nothing that's worth just giving it away. The institution of marriage does leave a lot to be debated over (given the practices in India), but I'm bringing this up taking into consideration the underlying thought behind this institution. Two people feeling a sense of responsibility towards each other (a simple practical definition - so as not to get into moral debates now). Is responsibility towards ONE other human being so much of a burden? In times where people manage dollar salaries and sports cars, is it so difficult for these very people to shoulder your responsibility to one person (who by the way you would care about [in love marriages] or at least try to care about [in arranged marriages])?

As I see it, Educational failures - not "to-die-for". Job failures - not "to-die-for". Any failure - not "to-die-for". A disagreement - not "divorce-worthy". An in-law dispute - not "divorce-worthy". Any squabble -not "divorce-worthy". Are we gonna give up so easily? I don't think so.